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| Jokes - Laugh A While |
03/30/2011
"I've just had the most awful time," said a boy to his friends. "First I got angina pectoris, then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering, I got psoriasis. They gave me hypodermics, and to top it all, tonsillitis was followed by appendectomy."
"Wow! How did you pull through?" sympathized his friends.
"I don't know," the boy replied. "Toughest spelling test I ever had."
"I don't speak German," one says to one of the cops, "Might you speak English?"
The cops shrug with incomprehension.
"Parlez vous francais," the biker says, non-plussed.
More shrugs.
"Parla Italiano?"
Shrugs
"Habla Espanol?"
Same thing. The guy even tries Portuguese and Latin, no luck.
Finally the bikers ride off, frustrated.
One cop looks at the other and says, "Hey, that guy spoke 6 languages!"
The first one shrugs one last time. "Yeah well, what good did it do him?"
A former secretary of commerce liked to tell how a high ranking official once responded to a subordinate's request for a raise by saying, "Because of the fluctuational predisposition of your position's productive capacity as juxtaposed to governmental statistics, it would be momentarily injudicious to advocate an incremental increase."
The staff person said, "I don't get it."
The official said, "That's right."
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