A farmer thought he had lost some sheep, so he sent his dog out to count them.
Ten minutes later, the dog came back.
"How many sheep in the field, lad ?" said the farmer.
"A hundred" said the dog.
"But we've only got 96 sheep" said the farmer.
"I know" said the dog "I rounded them up".
Two muffins in an oven (or hot cross buns, if you're feeling seasonal!)
One says to the other "gosh, it's hot in here!"
The other says "OH MY GOD!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out it was just an optical Aleutian.