Police officer talks to a driver: Your tail light is broken, your tires must be exchanged and your bumper hangs halfway down. That will be 300 dollars.
Driver: Alright, go ahead. They want twice as much as that at the garage.
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Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? There was no chemistry.
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A guest calls the waiter and complains, “How come there are no chairs at our table?!â€
The waiter shrugs, “I’m sorry but you only booked one table…â€
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A girl asks a boy: "Peter, how much do you love me?"
The boy looks her in the eyes, "Look up at the stars, that's how much I love you."
The girl is confused, “But it’s morning, there are no stars?â€
Boy nods, "Exactly!"