An accountant goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner shows him three identical parrots on a perch. ‘The parrot on the left costs £500,’ says the owner. ‘Why does that parrot cost so much?’ asks the accountant. ‘It knows how to do complex audits,’ says the shop owner. ‘How much does the middle parrot cost?’ asks the accountant. ‘That one costs £1,000,’ replies the shopkeeper. ‘It can do everything the first one can, plus it knows how to prepare financial forecasts.’ The accountant asks about the third parrot. It costs £4,000. ‘So what can that one do?’ he asks. ‘To be honest,’ says the shop owner, ‘I’ve never seen him do anything. But the other two call him Senior Partner.’

A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weeend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump.

‘Reverend,’ said the young man, ‘I’m so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip.’ The minister chuckled, ‘I know what you mean. *It’s the same in my

business.’

As a salesman, I was searching for a certain company in unfamiliar territory. I came to a likely-looking road marked with a small red sign reading: Industrial Center. I was not certain that this was the right road, so I drove back to a gas station to inquire.

The attendant took my arm and pointed to the sign that I had just read, now barely discernible in the distance.

“See that little sign about three blocks away?” he asked.“You mean the red one that says Industrial Center?” I asked.

“Man!” he exclaimed. “You’ve got eyes like an eagle!”

I couldn’t decide whether to go to Salt Lake City or Denver for

vacation, so I called the airlines to get prices. “Airfare to Denver

is $300,” said a cheery salesperson.

“And what about Salt Lake City?”

“We have a really great rate to Salt Lake–$99.00, but there is a

stopover.”

“Where?”

“In Denver.”